After reading Selekman's reading on bullying, there is one source of contention I have with the reading, not encouraging a kid to fight back. This isn't to say that this should be the first avenue travelled by a bullied student. They should tell their parents, friends, teachers, and principals. This is all well and good for support but this doesn't exactly stop the bullying when the bully is the most popular kid in school and he gets to keep acting out with impunity.
In my own personal experience a kid had bullied me for many years. He would run the gamet from insults to rumors but he never physically hit me. One bad day I took out my aggression on my brother. My dad told me that my actions were misplaced and if I really need to hit someone it should be the bully. Now, my dad isn't a child psychologist but it made more sense to hit the kid that deserved it then to bully my undeserving brother.
One day the bully assaulted me by shooting a spitwad point blank at my face. I started hitting him several times and gave him a black eye and bloody nose. I was punished for it but I don't think I've ever felt a better sense of justice in my life. Looking back there was probably a better way but afterward the bullying stopped by that kid completely. Is it so wrong that after all avenues have been taken that a bullied kid is told that he can fight back? I never got to the point of hurting myself or suicidal thoughts but are there some circumstances that a kid is better off hurting a deserving bully than themselves? These are just my opinions and statistics may be against me but I know that in my own personal experience fighting back helped me in my life.
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I would have to agree with you. As a last result sometimes maybe you have to just fight back. Bullying can cause a person a skewed sense of self and I believe that sometimes you just have to remember who you are and stand for yourself.
ReplyDeleteI believe in self-defense. If someone finds themself in a fight, whether it is their fault or not, they should be allowed to fight back. It is animal and human nature to fight back when being attacked. This may go back to survival of the fittest. For example, I don't think that you would ever see a dog start to fight another dog without the second one fighting back. Even if it's a chihuahua against a pitbull, the chihuahua would probably bite the pitbull's legs a few times before running away.
ReplyDeleteI think that individual circumstances should be taken into consideration when it comes to dealing with fights at school. I don't think that a kid should get in as much trouble if they were just defending himself. The kid who initiated the fight should get the majority of the punishment.
You said "looking back there was probably a better way" I would like to know it because what you did is the only route I see.
ReplyDeleteI think its good for kids to fight, it builds character. Sure punish them for it but don't be to harsh there is never a reason to expel a child for fighting a "fair" fight.